Having fallen hopelessly in love with a popstar, yes this story does start that way, or rather that wasn’t really the start… OK, let’s go somewhat from the start.
Whistle on a few years and he’s now a popstar. At this point I’d like to congratulate myself on my foresight. Somebody, maybe me, thought it’d be fun to ‘catch up’ and he looks more beautiful than ever and as charming as always. An evening of reminiscing, some light flirting and relief to be in the company of someone who you don’t have to pretend with, ok I pretend a little bit, leads to a full on transformation. I am no longer 25 with boyfriend, no I am 19 again, and the does he, doesn’t he angst, will he, wont he text back despair, has led me all the way back to acne. Seriously I feel like it’s a medical discovery, it is teenage angst that causes spots nothing to do with age or hormones. Some part of me takes over my rational thoughts and convinces me that he feels the same, that even though he has Russian supermodels to date now, really it’s me he’s always loved. I felt it, didn’t I?
As the weeks go by, post the best non date of my life where I smiled all the way home and felt that something magical inside, thoughts of fate and destiny swilling around this sick mind, he doesn’t get in touch. Doesn’t respond to a friendly text. Doesn’t ask for that drink before Christmas he discussed at the end of said non date. The rational mind fights with the fairytale to tell me what we all know, if he likes you, he calls. That simple. Yet the fairytale mind goes rogue, comes up with many explanations, not the ‘he may have lost his phone’ variety, I’m not that stupid. The ‘maybe he does like me but it put off by the fact I have a boyfriend’. Rational right? No, not really, if he likes you, he’s going to go for it whatever. The small inconvenience of a boyfriend being in the way never bothered this one before. Arrogant sod that he is.
So herein lies the conundrum, my heart says yes and my head says no, he’s not interested. What to do, what to do…Oh I know I have stumbled across the perfect solution which will give me all the answers on whether my intuition or my head is right. A few years ago, a long term boyfriend shockingly dumped me. Perhaps because it was the first time I’d been the dumpee (perhaps because he was too spineless to give me a real reason for breaking up), I remained convinced, for oh about 5 years now, that he had still loved me after we broke up. Call it intuition. So my master plan, if you haven’t guessed it already, was to contact old boyfriend in France and ask him if this was true? If he said yes, then my intuition and my ‘mandar’ are all in alignment and the pop star, he really does like me, always has. If not, then I will know to follow my boring, sensible, based on fact not feeling head. He loves me, he loves me not…
Ex boyfriend in France came back with this sparkly little gem; “Love no, lust yes. In the words of Paris Hilton; You’re hot”.
And that was the end of that one.
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