sexy-time

How much… is enough? // Yeah, you know what we mean…

Let’s talk about sex (baybee).
Yep, I’m going there.
Look away if easily offended…

sexy-time

TOWIE’s Mark Wright, of all people, has got me thinking… how much sex is enough?

You see, appaz the chauvinistic arsehole (to put it lightly) dumped his fiancée Lauren Goodger, after finding himself less attracted to her, and failing to consummate their relationship for two whole months.

Whilst, in no way would I hold up Mark and Lauren and their possible faux-mance at worst; seemingly unhealthy and unbalanced long-standing dalliance at best, as the archetypal relationship for all of us to aspire to, there is something to be thought over here.

In my opinion, disregarding Mark’s nefarious reputation when it comes to his treatment of Lauren, there’s something here that simply screams out at me: TWO MONTHS IS NOTHING!

Perhaps the background to my (extremely happy) relationship is to blame for me thinking two months without experiencing carnal knowledge of your other half isn’t that bad – we’ve done a lot of long distance-ing over the years, with the Atlantic ocean separating us for a total of four months earlier this year. Pretty crap, yes, but in the grand scheme of things, no biggy, right?

Or wrong? Asking around, it seems the amount of sex tantamount to a happy relationship is a very subjective, not to mention sensitive subject. Some ladies I know are shocked that I coped without dry humping a wall during our four month separation. Others take a view similar to myself – it’s only four months out of, well, hopefully forever, and a drop in the water compared to how long we’ve been together anyway.

A little research amongst my peers, and I discover that the number of times a week (or even month) couples have sex varies wildly. I know girls who are happy with once a month. I also discover I know girls who aren’t happy with anything less than once a day, although to be fair these girls are usually in the first throes passion; the honeymoon stage, where every situation together can be turned into something erotically charged, and staying in bed all day seems like the most exciting thing in the world, not just something you do when you’ve got a killer hangover.

We’ve all been there… but why does it last longer for some more than others?
Is it all down to your own sex drive?
And, you’ve got to wonder, what happens if your partner’s sex drive isn’t compatible with your own?
Is it something you try and work around, or is it simply proof your relationship is doomed to fail from the very start?

So, what I really want to know is, would you dump your significant other due to the curtailment of your sex life?
Of course, you probably would if it were a sign of your general lack of intimacy together – that’s never good. But what if you just didn’t have time? Or see each other enough? What if, like one girl I know of, you had to move back in with your parents and had a deranged fear of ever slipping one whilst they were in the same house? Could you cope with (and I’m going really crude here) a decline in the regularity of the old ‘hot beef injection’?

ooh-la-la

What do you think, ladies? Is sex a make-or-break kinda thing? Or could you stand to wait out a dry spell (ahem) because, ultimately, a bit of how’s-your-father isn’t of the most importance in the grand scheme of your love life? Let Le Blow know – we’re nosy bitches, after all.

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  • Comments

  • avatar
    Talli

    I think sex is important in a successful relationship but it really depends on the reasons you have sex in your individual relationship but also how much sex you were having to start with and whether both parties are happy with the situation now. For me it’s a great stress reliever and a way to be close to my mr, again it’s different for all. Me and my mr have gone through many phases we wanted it 2-3 times daily, daily, weekly, monthly, a dry spell of nearly 3 months and we seem to have found once or twice weekly works best for us now. 4 months really is a drop in the ocean in the grand scheme of things but personally if my hubby went away for 4 months I wouldn’t be able to survive without (ahem) some form of electrical stimulus but each to their own. There’s great communication in our relationship and were not afraid to discuss any bedroom problems and I’m sure that most successful long term relationships are the same. If our relationship had gone through a (very) dry spell of a year or more then the status of our relationship would be called into question. If my mr turned around to me tomorrow and said we would only have sex once a year from now on (birthdays and such like lol) then for me it would be a deal breaker, you may as well call it friends without benefits…..and a mortgage! 

  • avatar
    Fiona

    I totally agree, a normal sex life deffo goes through phases… I often wonder, though, if certain people just aren’t built to last those phases or if the phases are a sign of incompatibility between a couple? Agree though, we also have great communication in our relaysh and therefore, even when we have had to weather four months apart, although rubbish it was doable (with plenty of time to make up for the er, absence of physical love afterwards!)… surely a sign that we won’t end up the same fate as Mark and Lauren, eh?!

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