Let’s be honest, V Festival is hardly the Siberia of festival endurance; if anything it’s more like a weekend at your mothers – it’s not ideal or entirely comfortable but also not a wholly unpleasant experience either. As long as you are prepared. OH.

Now, noted there is very little need for Bear Grylls endurance-type prep for spending two days in a park in Essex (and NICE Essex at that I’ll have you know. Yes that’s where I’m from. Point proven *silence*). The worst sitch we will land in is to be stuck in a toilet queue between ghosts of Big Brother past and TOWIE present.

However, this doesn’t help the fact that it is but 2 days away and we ARE NOT PREPARED! I did once see Mickey Rourke there (I SHIT YOU NOT) so (in my mind) this could be the perfect opp to meet my future rock ‘n’ roll hubby (Jonny Borrell).

Therefore multi-tasking as only a Le Blow gal can, I have combined my to-do list with a handy how-to post…

This also serves as an emergency call-out, if anyone HAS any of the below items and would like to BRING to LB HQ, PACK for me and praps sort my train ticket and stage times that would be much appreciated. Tar.

Wildfox tee

Absolute FESTIVAL STANDARD for ‘just threw this on this morning’ festival glory and my personal new FAVE style (check out the uber-cute wings on the back. Swoon)

Wildfox Hells Angel Crew Neck T-Shirt, £60

Sunglasses of choice

Rayban Clubmasters. ALWAYS. This is not the time to try out a ‘new’ shape and push fashion boundaries. This is the time to hide the crazy drunk eyes. And make like a rock star. Sure.

Slutty tights/ socks combo

Sexy/ cute and generally adds to the whole rock-chick look and detracts attention from face and what is being ploughed into it (I am CLEARLY referring to Bacardi breezers here. Dur.)

ASOS Heart Suspender Sheer Tights, £10

Lippy

Lippy + sunnies = winning combo, even if the weather is against you. Boots 17 Lasting Fix is a total win (let’s be honest the middle of a field is NOT the time to be busting out the Chanel) and their ‘Showcase’ is just the right pinky side of red, and at under a fiver who cares if you drop it in a pint of cider.

Jewellery

MORE IS MORE. What do you mean it’s Essex not Woodstock? PAH. Check Urban Outifitters for awesome pendants to layer up like Mr T.

Converse

Leopard print, obvs. Or DMs. Comfortable, practical, and kick ass. Only bust out wellies if necessary. This isn’t Glasto and there’s nothing worse than a tube journey back to London looking like a festival wanker (BELIEVE ME).

Hat

For 2^nd day festival hair. Now we’re not technically camping but this does NOT mean we can be arsed to wash our hair for two days in a row *wrinkles nose* and I for one will be Daisy Lowe-ing to the max in a trusty bowler hat come Day 2 – see Exhibit A (hats at Lovebox):

Note horrendous rain fringes? NO?! That’s the beauty of the hat. It ain’t rocket science, this fashion malarkey- also it’s virtually impossible not to enjoy yourself while wearing a hat. Fact.

Rain mac

NOT a kagool (Duke-of-Edinburgh-Award-Scheme is NOT what we are going for people) but it IS good to be prepared, so I will mostly be taking this guy, and hoping I only need to use it as a barrier between me + mud when I’m face down at approx 9am (ahem 5pm).