This article does exactly what it says on the tin. Here’s ten reasons why I love Mary Portas – inspired by watching her latest venture: The Great British Knicker Experiment…
ONE //
Her hairstyle is so famous it works as a recognizable trademark. The Ginger Bob™, self branding at its best.
TWO //
I imagine that Mary Portas never thinks, “is this skirt too short for a 50 year old?” As long as you can still pull it off, which she can, you’re never too old.
THREE //
She’s a lesbian. I can’t explain why this makes me like her more, it just does.
FOUR //
Mary Portas doesn’t take any shit from anyone. Especially the men in suits who say her plans won’t work only to be proved wrong. Don’t you just love those moments in life?
FIVE //
She revamped charity shops. Now they have gone all boutique like with stripped back wooden floors and a focus on vintage products and less second hand underwear. Which can only be a good thing.
SIX //
She’s not embarrassed to walk down Oxford Street with a megaphone shouting about customer service and eventually being kicked out of Primark.
This encourages me to be less British about terrible service; I’ve not worked myself up to the level of complaining to the manager quite yet but I have stopped being effusively thankful that eventually someone took my money after being treated like I was interrupting their conversation at the till.
SEVEN //
Mary Portas is as hard as nails, but she also cries. Which I feel is a middle finger up to the women who claim that to be successful in the business world you have to behave like a man and show no emotion.
Crying is definitely not acceptable as people may think you have PMT and are therefore incapable of making rational decisions uninfluenced by your severe emotional state. At least I presume that is their argument.
Mary might metaphorically have bigger balls than most of the men she encounters but at the same time she isn’t afraid to use and show emotion. It’s all about the timing.
EIGHT //
She put dildos and vibrators in her House Of Fraser shop much to the embarrassment of the aforementioned suits. Classic.
NINE //
She has the ear of the prime minister. Mary is consulting the government on how to get our high streets back to their bustling best. Rather her than some local MP wearing a suit from Next.
I think I’d be a good partner for Mary on this task having done extensive research on shopping destinations throughout the UK and Europe.
TEN //
She’s not scared to take on a challenge. Even when there is a strong possibility of failing in front of millions of viewers.
And that should be a lesson to us all – we’re often too scared to try something for fear of failure but next time you feel like that think at least there isn’t a camera crew documenting it for all to see.
That’s my Jerry Springer style thought of the day.
WATCH Mary Portas in Mary’s Bottom Line, Thursdays at 9pm on Channel 4.
BUY Mary Portas’ made in the UK Kinky Knickers range at Liberty London
Bottoms up!
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