The less she says about herself the better but highlights include: Sailor Jerry’s. Blips, beeps and bass. That time she fell on a lawnmower. Stripper poles. TV boxsets. Ripped tights
Oh, MTV. We’d all but given up on you. You once entertained us with hours of hyper-colour music videos and cruelly replaced with endless series of My Super Sweet 16 – where no one is sweet and even fewer are 16 – before brutally introducing the world to Snooki’s gherkins (scarring). Soon a general shitstorm […]
We’ve got your number weather, so give it up and stop teasing us with your bloody ‘sunshine in September’ antics. We’ve read The Mirror (what? It was an accident. We tripped and fell on a copy) and it told us about the early onset snow in October, arriving just in time to shit on our […]
It’s a given that any video release from Lady Gaga is going to elicit more hype than the Harry Potter kids snorting lines of coke off a stripper’s arse. ‘Telephone’ for example, has become so revered as part of the pop cultural zeitgeist, anyone would think she’d made the next fucking Godfather movie (she didn’t. […]
Those riots were a bit of a hoot weren’t they? Well, maybe if you weren’t looting or setting fire to some poor family’s legacy, but if you were a.) a hooded adolescent with a lifetime’s supply of Nando’s loyalty cards or b.) Vic and Bob off the telly, then you were probably feeling a little […]
Bryan Ferry. The Futureheads. Kenickie. No matter which way you look at it, Sunderland’s impressive track record for pedigree musical output cannot be denied (WHAT?). Anyway, this year the home of the gaw-juss Geordies has brought us Frankie and the Heartstrings – an energetic quintet with sexy quiffs and great big bouncing tunes. Phwoar. Here’s […]
Rock stars have a pretty fucking wild life. It’s all snorting coke off stripper’s boobies this, and biting bat’s heads off that. Well I for one am yawning my tits off with their cliched (and probs false) tales of debauchery. Just settle down and watch some fucking Emmerdale will you? (JOKES! No one should ever […]
The hottest thing to come out of St. Albans since S Club 7’s Paul Cattermole (BABE), Friendly Fires are releasing their second album, Pala, today which of course is reason to hyperventilate with excitement and scream like a big girl because WHO THE FUCK DOESN’T LOVE FRIENDLY FIRES?!* I can’t be the only one to […]
Pigeon shit magnets Kings of Leon have just released a trailer to their upcoming documentary, Talihina Sky: The Story of Kings of Leon. Chronicling the band’s entire hedonistic, model fucking, beard growing career, director Stephen C. Mitchell chases the Followill brothers around with a camera (I wish that was my job) starting from their days […]
Can I just take this opportunity to suggest that R&B is making a comeback? You know, the sort that was popular circa 1992-2002 and provoked England’s midriff bearing teens to get an ill-advised tramp stamp and septic belly button ring – sexy, non? Anyway, I for one, am joyous at this news. Call me tasteless, […]
It’s the Oscars on Sunday and to be honest, we couldn’t be more excited. Is it down to the gowns, blubbing or gratuitous close-ups of the losing parties’ strained smiles? No dummies. It’s James Franco of course. Those wunderkinds at the Academy have eschewed the usual po-faced has-beens (JOKES, Billy Crystal) for the thinking man’s […]
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