All the outfits from the MTV Movie Awards // AKA what the Bejesus were they wearing?

Ah, I like the MTV Movie Awards. They’re a bit silly and laidback (with awards such as Best Kiss and Best Scared Shitless performance) and therefore all the ladies of Hollywood wear shorter skirts and blow kisses to the camera on the red carpet. You’d think, because of this informality, that it would be hard to get the red carpet look wrong, wouldn’t it?

Not a chance. Have a look at how shit some of these girls look…

Emma Watson

Emma Watson MTV Awards

A bit of boring one, but then what would you expect from play-it-safe Emma? I don’t buy this whole ‘she’s a style icon’ thing. She’s probably a style icon to my mum, in the sense that this is the sort of thing my mum would want me to wear. Except with two inches added to the hem. Even though I’m 25.

Blake Lively


Ah, this is better. Don’t worry Blake, you can forget about those nude photos doing the rounds (which are SO OBVIOUSLY REAL, despite your denials) and the fact that they’re probably going to cost you your burgeoning PR relationship with Leo DiCaprio, because Le Blow thinks you were one of the best dressed at the MTV Movie Awards, and that’s practically like winning an Oscar. Or at least a three-legged race at sports day.

Bryce Dallas Howard


My eyes, my eyes! This dress probably looked really nice on the catwalk. On Bryce though, well – if you squint a bit, it looks like she’s naked except for a flash of neon pink paint down her front, over her baby bump. Maybe that’s the look she was going for?

Reese Witherspoon


Aunty Reese won the Generation Award, for her dedication to making movies for the yoof of MTV. I think she was worried about looking like mutton dressed as lamb, so she went for a nice-but-boring dress. Fair enough; she’s had gazillions of red carpets in her career already, she doesn’t need to stand out anymore.

Hailee Steinfeld


Someone’s stylist is trying to make them a style icon, eh? Whilst it might be more eye-catching than ‘shittest style icon in the world’ Emma Watson, it’s eye-catching for all the wrong reasons. She’s 14! Hailee my love, we know that you think you’re a grown up and you want to prove it by eschewing peter pan collars and ballet pink for a tuxedo like what grown-ups wear, except…  grown-ups don’t wear crap like this. Stick to your girly Marchesa!

Emma Stone


La Stone can do no wrong in my eyes, both sartorially and generally. This is probably the sort of classy, understated look Aunty Reese should have gone for, but actually on Emma it looks cool rather than classic. Love her.

Kristin Stewart


WHY DOES SHE ALWAYS HAVE SUCH AWFUL HAIR?! No, but really, WHY? Did she mess it up on the way shagging R-Patz in the limo? (And now there is the sound of a thousand twi-hards having an orgasm at the thought.) Decent dress ruined by shit hair. You played Joan Jett ages ago, Kristin, there’s no excuse not to sort your barnet out anymore.

Rosie Huntington-Whitely


Sorry, but does anyone else miss Megan Fox?

Cameron Diaz


I don’t have much to say about Cameron, but she always does minimalist chic really well, I think. I like this little black playsuit. Probably one of the stand-out outfits of the evening.

Jessica Szohr


It’s not that I don’t appreciate a nice jumpsuit on the red carpet. It’s just that this isn’t a nice jumpsuit.

Fiona Goby

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