How to… get the polka dot trend spot on (groan)

Polka dots are spot-on for spring – we’ve spotted lots of fashion-forwarded A-listers pictured in polkas recently and they were dotted all over the SS/’11 catwalks. Oh God. This is going to be a l-o-n-g post if I carry on with the polka puns, non? I’ll spot now. I mean, stop now.

Like with most things in my life, I go through phases of being OBSESSED with something for a short period of time and then a new other thing will take my fancy and I’ll swap them like Katie Price does husbands. Take food for example – last week I had M&S’ Cantonese Chicken & Mushroom Rice ‘in-a-pot meal’ for lunch everyday. I’ll no doubt be repulsed by it next week, silly cow.

I’ve a similar approach to fashion. In the same week I wolfed down the aforementioned ready meal, ’60s style mini-dresses and silver shoes rocked my world. The next week it was all about trousers and brogues.

Anyway, here’s how I’ve been doing dots – my current obsession – so far this season. I’m by no means saying I am The Fashion Oracle, but it’s nice to let someone else do all the hard work, isn’ it?

Use an accessory to try out a trend first…

The best way to try out a trend for the first time is by way of an accessory. It’s cheaper than investing in a head-to-toe look, and if it goes tits up, you can just lose the accessory and return to Normal You in a matter of minutes, no questions asked. Except maybe by Gareth from Accounts. Just tell him to ‘eff off and mind his own.

So, a couple of weeks back I snapped up a chiffon (no, that’s a lie. I’m trying to sound posher than I really am. It’s actually 100% flammable fucking polyester, okay?) scarf plastered in polka dots. For my first step into spots, I tied it pussy-bow style and slung on my trusty sailor dress. I’d also spotted (sorry… sorry!) some polka dot tights in *cough* Primark, so chucked them into the mix, too. A double dose of dots, if you will. Hell, I even paired navy with black – that’s just the sort of rule-breaking, crazy muvva I iz – but you don’t have to be so bold.

Work the trend into your usual look…

My default style is ‘Rawk ‘n’ Rolled Out of Bed’. Here, I rocked up my dots by sticking with a predominantly black palette and pairing my sheer spotted blouse with skinny jeans and studded pointy pumps. A slash of red lippy, a leopard print belt and the obligatory bed-head hair. These were all things I already owned (particularly my hair; I’ve had it all my life), making the whole ensemble look like I haven’t tried too hard. Which clearly I did, but that’s not the point, okay?

Also: I think I must have subliminally been inspired by Alexa Chung’s look at the GQ Style Awards a week earlier:

I look better, obviously. Though I need to get me some red jeans. I foolishly threw out my Zara pair c.2006, thinking coloured jeans will NEVER come back, especially red ones. They did. I’m an idiot. Let’s move on.

Use the sunshine as an excuse to experiment…

Spots seem so right in the sunshine! By now, I was getting a bit bolshy with my dots. I flung on a dotted Peter Pan collar dress – which actually covered my arse the last time I wore it, I’m sure – and white cable tights (incidentally not spotted, but purchased from Dorothy Perkins, AKA Dotty P’s, so I win yet again). If you’re nervous about trying a new trend, a sunny day is always the perfect excuse to depart from your usual style. Blame it on the sunshine (Big Fun and the Jackson 5 would wholeheartedly disapprove).

Make last season’s style look oh-so now…

Blimey, my hair looks HUGE here. Anyway, taking an accessory in this season’s print and applying to last season’s trend is an excellent way of updating your wardrobe for cheaps. So I donned double denim and added my dotty scarf et voila, one fashion forward fucker.

Obviously, by the time you read this, I’ll have deemed dots as ‘so last week’ and have moved on to my next fashion infatuation, but the above rules can be applied to most trends. Just make sure you don’t OD on dots, else you’ll end up looking like Super Ted’s bumbling buddy, Spotty:

Natalie Wall

  • Comments

  • avatar

    OMG – I can not believe you threw out the Zara red jeans!! I remember you wearing them to Kasabian at the Albert Hall and how damn hawt you looked in them. I think Serge had them on too…………

    • avatar

      Serge *did* have them on. i believe you were mocking me until he steped out wearing THE SAME JEANS AS ME! I am BEYOND gutted and cannot even talk about it. Bugger bollocks damn and FUCK!

  • avatar

    I like the first scarf, top and dress! Ok so basically I love polka dots! The first image shows the polka dot scarf paired with a dress consisting of some stripes. From what I’ve gathered from this year’s spring and summer collections, stripes and polka dots together are a winner. People in retail jobs jobs are so lucky, they probably don’t even need to read up on the latest trends because they work with them every day and get the first pick of all the best clothes!

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