Things that made us go WTF? this week // Slebs and their strange new looks

Sweet Jesus. Our WTF? radar has been pinging all over the shop this week, mostly powered by attention seeking slebs giving themselves another ‘look at me, look at me!’ makeover.
Still, it clearly worked on all fronts. Look at them, we bloody well did. Whilst shouting in slow-mo: ‘What. The. Actual. Fuckery. Is. THAT?!’

Jodie Marsh wins world’s worst spray tan contest

Like we said on Twitter earlier, Jodie Marsh’s new bod looks like a sun-dried scrotum. A knackered old nut-sack. With leathery old chamois skin. She reckons:

This is the best I’ve ever felt, and the best my body has ever felt too. In just 50 days I have gone from 25% body fat to 10% body fat, gained 8 pounds of muscle, and lost 20 pounds of fat. In 8 weeks I have achieved what normally takes 6 to 9 months.

And who are we to argue? With guns like that she’d get us in a headlock and smash the shit out of us. Having said that, here’s our WTF? formula to get the Jodie Marsh look:


Of course, there’s a reality TV show behind it all. Our Jodie doesn’t so much as fart these days without it being recorded for prosperity. So we look forward to seeing Jodie Marsh: Bodybuilder on the DMAX channel (no, we’ve not heard of that one, either) in January 2012.

Nicola Roberts’ fishy new do

Okay, so this might have happened more than a week ago, when Nicola played at London’s GAY but seriously: we’ve only just got over the fearsome assault on our eyeballs. Our retinas were scorched for realz. That and the fact that the exotically named @ElenaLugris on Twitter only pointed it out to us the other day. What?

nicola-roberts-collageWords honestly fail me – espesh when Ms Roberts has been photographed looking so stylish on various Fashion Week frows of late.
But clearly she (or her stylist, who should be sacked immediately) thought it’d be ‘fun’ to put together some satin Harlequin hot-pants with neon leopard print boots and a mile long Rapunzel-esque fishtail plait tied in a knot.
And d’ya know, I could almost forgive her all of that.
Now there’s a sentence I never thought I’d write.

And before you get all hoity-toity with outraged cries of, ‘it’s a stage costume – it’ll be alright when she’s dancing and that!’ It didn’t, okay? Even MC Hammer in the background is trying to shuffle away quietly…


Oh no, Flo! Where’d your fringe go?


We had Lily Allen’s barn dance style appearance in 2009 but for S/S’12 Karl Lagerfeld’s muse is Florence Welch (of and the Machine fame), giving us an ethereal performance on the Chanel catwalk today. It was very Botticelli-Venus-esque, but we couldn’t get over the difference a fringe (or lack thereof) makes! We’ve no further comments to make than that, really. Wow. Just, wow.

Until next week WTFers. Do point out anything you spot that you want us to include in this featurette over on Twitter. You won’t win a prize. But we’ll think you’re WELL COOL.

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