Things that made us go WTF? // 10-year-old models and Shane Warne, mostly…

This is an occasional series, rearing it’s bewildered, fugly head as and when things pop up in the news (or on Perez Hilton) that quite simply make us go: WTF? What. The. Actual. Fuckage?

And it’s been a while. Cheryl Cole’s disastrous wardrobe in the US gave us lots of mileage, but then silly Simon Cowell sacked her and we didn’t have anything to laugh and point at for a bit. Until now, that is…

10-year-old girl looking hotter than we probably ever will in our lives



Now, whilst we certainly don’t condone the sexualisation of young children, this much we do know: every little girl loves to play dress up; clumsily dolling herself up in her mum’s make-up and tottering about in over-sized high heels. And admittedly, this probably is a bit much of Vogue Paris.

But! And we’re going to say this as no one else will have the balls to do so: ten-year-old Thylane Lena-Rose Blondeau does look amazing, if a little weird in this shoot. She sort of looks like a very attractive, very well dressed munchkin, and has a similar figure to that of most rakish supermodels, anyhoo. Oh god, we’re treading on thin ice here, aren’t we? Let’s move on…

From Mr Burly to Mr Hurley


Massive WTF? points go to Shane Warne this week. Bonus ones, even. I mean, holy tit clamps! Where to begin?

We at LB have been watching Shane’s transformation with great interest ever since he and Liz Hurley went ‘official’. It started off quite subtly at first: a botox jab here; a spot of hair serum there. But in the last week or so Hurley’s metrosexual manipulation of a former rugged alpha male – and a typical Aussie cricketer one at that – has started to assault my eyes.

She’s buffed, glossed, groomed and pruned Shaney boy into oblivion:

The neat yellow hair! The embalmed skin! The mahogany hue! The trout pout! The snug shirt! The sweat patches! The snake hips! The girly belt! The bootcut jeans! The pointy shoes!

We’re not sure if we’re crying with laughter our crying at something which is essentially quite disturbing, and borderline tragic, but we have only this to say:


Cameron Diaz and her bulging bikini


When this picture of Cameron Diaz in a bikini landed in the LB office, I actually put down my doughnut in disgust. I mean, the quest for a bikini body can get the better of all of us, but do you really want the cries of admiration to be, ‘cor, look at the shoulders on that!’? Does any girl REALLY want to be described as ‘brawny’? Maybe, like Mr Warne above, she’s trying to please her other half – baseball player A-Rod, as we hear-tell he enjoys a workout or two.

Yes, she looks great for 38; yes, she’s clearly visited the gym more times in a week than we’ve been IN OUR LIVES and yes, it looks like she has a penis in the photo above. What is with that?

Natalie Wall

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