Don’t get me wrong. The new John Lewis Christmas TV ad, did make me feel a bit warm and fuzzy inside. But I definitely didn’t cry. And I’m an emotional wreck who’ll shed a tear at the drop of the hat. Things I cried at recently include:
Watching the Jimmy Savile tribute on BBC1 last night
The combination of reminiscing over Jim’ll Fix It and my lost yoof + discovering that he ran over 200 marathons and did a lot for charidee was just too much. I weeped, gently to myself as the end credits rolled and Florence and the Machine sang.
Boo, the ‘world’s cutest dog’
I watched a video of Boo the bloody dog (I can’t even remember which one now, but it was probably a lot like this one) and my heart exploded at the same time as salt water welled in my eyes. Just at the sheer cuteness of it all. I know, I know. I’m a knob.
C4’s Top Boy
My bloke-like tendencies mean I enjoy watching a bit of shoot ’em up violence just for fun. However, the big pansy inside me means I also get extremely upset when the ‘goodie’ gets it, in this case Mr Nice Guy Leon (and right in the bollocks! Awful way to go…).
I also cried – natch – when Marnie the dog got strung up. In fact, I was probably more miffed about the dog than the man. See previous point.
Very nearly slicing off my toe by accident
The blood! The pain!
The swears! The sweats!
Like stubbing your toe but ten trillion times worse. Legitimate tears here, I’d say. Although maybe the tears of a clown, distraught at my own stupidity at falling over IN MY OWN FLAT. Night time trips to the toilet, toes, and tiles do not mix well, my friends. Take it from someone who knows – someone with two stitches in their fourth toe (my, er, ‘ring toe’?) but who still refuses to wear UGGs (in public, at least).
So, with all the above in mind, you’d think I’d be a prime candidate for blubbing away enthusiastically at the new John Lewis ad. And so, I watched it and thought to myself:
Dear John Lewis: abandoned dogs in snow surrounded kennels make me cry, certainly. But I’m not going to mourn the loss of tinny transistors and bad fashion. Yours, pissed off of Pinner.
And then I realised I was watching the WRONG SODDING VIDEO. This ‘through the ages’ one, for those that want to point and laugh.
When I eventually landed on the correct, ‘gifts you can’t wait to give’ ad, I settled back, Kleenex in hand (that makes it sound like I was preparing to watch porn, involving an altogether different sort of giving, no?) and watched… and waited… but no tears. Not even one sniffly hiccup. WHAT?! I demand a refund, John Lewis, I’ve been knowingly undersold here!
It is a very lovely ad, and it does make me feel a bit Christmassy. The boy is unarguably adorable, and the sentiment lovely. The prerequisite plinkety-plonkety piano is there. But from all the hooplah on Twitter yesterday, I was pretty much expecting to wail like a very upset Banshee. My viewing pleasure was also slightly hampered by @ASOS_James‘ reaction on Twitter:
ref #johnlewisad when I was too young to buy gifts, I made my way down to Boots, bought, wrapped and gave my mum a box of Tampax for Xmas
Kind of lost all hope of getting my weep on after that, really. So, anyway. Here it is. Though I’m sure you’ve all seen it by now. But the question is: DID IT MAKE YOU CRY? The only advert that makes me cry is the shite M&S X Factor ad; what a piece of depressingly insipid dribble of pale nothingness that is by comparison, eh?
Comments
RedHead
I didn’t cry either. It’s a bloody advent.