The Manifesto // Girls and their oddball shoe choices. Discuss?

The Le Blow Manifesto. We ask our panel of men (Manel?) for the truth. On important things. Like: girls and their often bonkers shoe choices. Discuss…

shoes

MAN 1 //

Most men don’t give a shit about shoes. And the rest are too busy wanking over a prized pair of patent leather pumps to ever meet a real-life woman anyways.

That isn’t to say that the right pair of shoes don’t make girls look great. However, Crocs and Uggs are definitely not the right kind of shoes and should never be worn outside the house. Oddly enough, the same goes for vertiginously high heels too. Both you and I know you’ll be buckling to the ground like a baby horse the minute you’ve had a drink, so why bother?

MAN 2 //

So the thing here is that it’s less about how odd the shoes are, it’s whether they actually look any good. It’s always better to have an interesting / cool / oddball pair of shoes on rather than some boring ones. General rule of thumb, though is: the higher the heel, the better.

MAN 3 //

I like a good shoe. If I’m being picky, I like two. It’s something I often notice before anything else. Not in a “Let’s get licky and feed my fetish” way… it’s just that I love shoes. I do have gripes though. In fact I have lots but, as you’ve requested Boots and Heels not War and Peace, I have decided to focus on one in particular: the Raptor Step.

Girls, please continue to wear heels as we love them. Occasionally we might get annoyed that you end up being slightly taller than us or other lads are now looking at your pins wishing they were wrapped around their… erm… waist but ultimately we’re OK with this as deep down we (read ‘I’) bloody love girls who can rock a decent pair of heels.

However, as with the road safety and substance abuse, you do need to know your limits. I am seeing FAR too many ladies attempt a tall heel only to develop a rather painful looking stance that can only be summed up as that of a baby velociraptor.

You know it right? Slightly squat, knees bent a little, looks like you could be possibly shuffling to the toilet because you’ve had a tiny accident…yeah? OK. If you take nothing else from my musings, please remember one thing: the velociraptor is not a style icon. It is a genus of dromaeosaurid theropod dinosaur that roamed the earth in the latter stages of the Cretaceous period. Now there’s a style tip you won’t read in the glossies…

The Le Blow men have spoken. Now have YOUR say here:

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6 total comments on this postSubmit yours
  1. Man 3 sounds like a right drongo.

    • ‘Drongo’? Have you been watching Neighbours on repeat?

  2. Oh mann…so… i’m totes wearing uggs today…i know…i know > but only because i’m feeling a lil’ disabled after wearing my “fresh to death” new hi-tops.
    So basically i’ve worn lesbian flats and as a result needed to wear uggs to recover – thus suggesting i’ll never be loved by a man. :(
    hopeless.

    • I KNOW WHO YOU ARE. And with a purdy face like yours you don’t need to worry about shoesies, yeah? ;)
      But tell me this: did you wear your UGGs indoors as expensive outsize slippers or did you venture outside?? Also: the coolness of wearing OTM hi-tops almost cancels out the crapness of UGGs. Almost, yeah?

  3. What is the deal if heel makes you taller than the man? This is a problem which plagues me every day. Do I go for a heel and look down on all men? Do I only go to basketball courts and meet super tall men? Do I wear lesbian flats and be normal size??

    WHAT IS THE ANSWER?????

    *rocks back and forth*

    • Actually. I hear ya sister. I may well put this conundrum (probably spelled wrong – I’ve had wine) to The Manel themselves. Their thoughts on a girl being taller than them or the ‘perfect’ height for a girl and that. Stay tuned!

      PS how tall are ya? x

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